We are on day three of six of Ms Rs swimming lessons. On the first day Master R went to spend some special time with my Mum so that I could be completely available and focussed on Ms R. She was feeling nervous on the way so it really helped that it was just the two of us. We stood by the pool holding hands while the register was taken, she is in a class with four boys, and then I stood close by while they made their entry into the water. I watched as they bounced to the far side, she gave me a thumbs up sign when she got there and then when they came back she leant over towards me and told me that I could go and sit down with the other Mums now. That is the bit that I’m most proudest of, the fact that she didn’t need me to stay close. She sent me away because she is now confident and independant enough to be able to do things on her own. Since then we’ve gone straight to the seating area and when the lesson has been about to start she’s gone by herself. For years I’ve been aware that she has been needy and for want of a better word, clingly but now the time has come where other people no longer have an opinion on how I should ‘make her independant’. I expect those opinions will change now to how I should ‘let her go’.
She seems to have made friends with the other non-swimmers, each day she chats to the smallest boy and his Mum who arrive first, she sits on the side next to a chatty boy with pretty shorts before getting in and as she and another boy are always fastest across the pool she usually has a natter with him too while waiting for the others. She loves the teacher although is probably a bit more chatty than the teacher is used to. One boy didn’t make it today so when his name was called at the register instead of there being the silence usually associated with an absentee Ms R could be heard quite clearly commenting that he didn’t appear to be here yet. On day two she was given a plastic swim bag which she proudly carried in to the changing rooms today where we saw a much bigger girl with the same one so she struck up a conversation with her and they chatted about their lessons.
The swimming itself is also going well. She seems to have the hang of kicking her legs so while three out of the four boys seem to end up splashing around in the middle of the pool clutching their floats she puts her head down and torpedoes across at amazing speeds sometimes having to steer around the others. The bit she finds hardest is putting her face in the water but she is doing it more and finding it easier and I can see that if she continues with lessons it won’t be long before she can swim along under the surface.
And I’ve made a friend too! The Mum of the smallest boy is the only other parent who watches the lessons so I guess it was always going to happen. She was surprised to hear that Ms R has only recently turned five as she said from speaking to her she thought she was much older and then she asked that inevitable question. I explained that we home educated which was initially met with surprise and then a ‘whatever works for you’ type of response. She then offloaded about all the problems they’ve had with school recently (which seemed to involve punches to the stomach and face 
) and then asked how I knew I was covering everything which was probably meant with reference to the national curriculum but I answered by saying how Ms R had never been regulated so didn’t need me to organise her or tell her what to do. She asked about ‘me time’ and I explained that I try to get them into bed for seven o’clock which gives me a few hours before bed every night. She asked about if we’d consider school in the future and I said if Ms R wanted to go we’d support her but actually it wouldn’t really be a case of going to school but more a case of leaving home education and then ironically said that she’d probably miss her friends too much if she had to go to school. It was all very interesting and sometimes I surprise myself with the things I say about it.